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Archive for May 2010

Beatrice:     Brody had a horrible-no good-very bad day at preschool today! I guess he was quite the bully, and then argued with the teacher after she told on him to daddy. He claimed this other boy started it by spitting on him. The teacher told Toolman that he has never acted this way in the two years she has had him, and that even after getting after him, he still acted out. Needless to say he is in trouble. I guess he was hugging kids, putting a headlock grip on the boys, and just pushing them to the edge. When Toolman said that he is going to have to tell his mommy, Brody started to cry. I wonder if it has to do with school almost being done for the year? Either way he is in big trouble.

Lila:     Oh boy. Maybe it is the end of the year. When I was a schoolteacher, the kids would act up more when they knew vacation was starting soon. It is also the spring. All of a sudden, the birds are chirping, the flowers are blossoming, and the bear awakens. This holds true with children as well.

What are you going to do?

B:     I am going to watch him to see if there are any changes. But for now, we are going to have a conversation and take away his favorite item until he proves himself at the next preschool day, which is Thursday. He was just given a new toy on Sunday and I may take that a way, not sure quite what item to take yet.

L:     Wow. I have not been there yet, but like I said before, bigger kids, bigger problems. I am sure it is just a small incident.

Thomas misbehaves from time to time with me, more so than with his dad. He likes to see how far he can get with me. I have put him in timeout and I think it works because when I scold him, he laughs. Boy, is it frustrating.

B:     I think it is funny that you mention a topic, “you” being anyone, and the very topic arises. It is like saying I haven’t been sick in years, and bam you get hit with the worst cold of the decade. I am anxious to get home and see what Brody has to say.

L:     Maybe we have ESP. Lol.

I wonder if he will try to kiss up to you. I know Thomas does that the moment he knows he did something wrong.

B:     He use to do that, but now he knows to get it over with. He definitely has a guilty conscience and can’t deal with it. Which I am glad that he is like this, as I know the little guy knows right from wrong.

L:     Then he’ll know not to behave like a bully again.

B:     The teacher made a point to say he was not bullying, but that is the only adjective I can use to describe what I think it was.

L:     Well I am sure he won’t misbehave, again.

B:     Not for a while I hope. 🙂

Beatrice:     So there is a house on our block where the family has lived there for around 6-7 years. I use to see the man and woman walk their dog every morning and we would wave and sometimes exchange words. They have a son and daughter. Last summer I started noticing the lady wearing scarfs and hats, and told my husband that she must have cancer. I spoke to her for a short while on Halloween when the kids trick-or-treated at her home, and she said she has her spirits up and just taking a day at a time. Last Sunday, Toolman was washing his motorcycle and came in to tell me the ambulance and fire truck were at either their home or the house next door. Then my friend across the street stated she was taken to a hospice where they have given her a month to live. Her daughter is a freshman in high school and the son is a freshman in college. You can tell the husband has lost a ton of weight and is not doing well emotionally. Nadia was telling me the story after she asked if I wanted to go in on a baby gift for another one of our neighbors. I then told Nadia that we need to do something for this family as a neighborhood. Makes me so sad. I keep thinking how this daughter and son have to go through life not knowing from one day to the next if their mother is going to survive. Makes my heart heavy.

Lila:     That’s so hard to read. I really don’t know what to say. Maybe before you send them a gift or something, you can ask if they need anything. Or you can do what we are doing for our teammate. We originally tried to pay for lawn care while the family is having to deal with their family cancer issues. The lawn care company offered to do it for free. We are now putting together some gift baskets. Maybe you and your neighbors can just mow their lawn while you are doing yours. I think little gestures mean so much more than material gifts.

B:     I totally agree with all of that. I just can’t stop thinking about how the children feel and what they are going through. I lived such a carefree childhood and all children should. And then it makes you think about what if this sort of thing happened to you as a parent. What would you do? What would you want most for your kids? How do some children take only good out of a horrible situation and how do some turn the wrong way because of all the grief? It was hard for me to want to go in on a gift for a lady who isn’t really all that nice who is on her 3rd child, knowing that down the street a crisis is really going on in that family’s home. Makes me so sad!

L:     That’s fine that you don’t want to give that other lady a gift. She probably doesn’t need anything because she is on her third child. But she does deserves well-wishes. She is bringing another wonderful child into the world and that is worth celebrating.

As for the sick neighbor, I am sure it is hard on the children. But the truth is, if it has to end, it’s a good thing that it is ending quickly. I know a family who dealt with cancer for 10 years before she eventually passed away. The boys never really knew their mother as a healthy person. The youngest, who was 12 or 13, when she passed away, was absolutely heartbroken. He will go through life holding onto just a few happy memories. At least these kids have some wonderful memories of their mother young and vibrant.

B:     I have already given the lady down the street some of E’claires things and I have expressed all sorts of well wishing and will go see the baby once it is born. I was just taken back when Nadia wanted to figure out a gift for her but not think about something we can do as neighbors for this family. Once I mentioned it though she was all for it, but wanted me to set it up. This is where I use my father’s advice for approaching the needs of terminally ill. Having a father who is a reverend comes in handy in these scenarios.

Beatrice:     Toolman’s brother is in town and will be staying over at our home tonight. We are having a BBQ for him and his wife, and all of Toolman’s CO family will be coming over. Here I am at work knowing they will all be showing up at 5. So not ready for this.

It is interesting to see his relationship with them because he was not raised around his brothers. He has 4 half brothers from his dad’s first marriage. The boys were raised in Oregon, which is where Toolman is from but Toolman moved here when he was 5. He almost has a better and closer relationship with them than he does with his full blood sister who he lived with. Interesting huh?

Lila:     Maybe because they are brothers. Same sex siblings have different relationships, I am guessing.

I am sure Toolman is working to get everything ready for the BBQ.

B:     He is working on sprucing up the house, marinating the steak, shrimp, and chicken. He is excited about everyone coming over. John, his brother, came in last Saturday and we had dinner over at Toolman’s sisters.

I love my brother, but sometimes wonder what it would be like to have had a sister. My mom is extremely close to her sisters, and not so much with her brother. My brother and I were pretty close before we both got involved with our spouses. I know I can call him and get advice or have a shoulder to lean during those important times, but I don’t just ring him up to chat about nothing. I do that to my husband or my mom. But I bet I would do this if I had a sister. Probably very normal between sisters and brothers.

L:     I used to be so envious of my brothers because they seemed like the best of friends. I thought it was because they were close in ages and I wasn’t, but I think their gender has a lot more to do with it. I always wished I had a sister to share things with. There are just certain things you cannot share with the opposite sex. I mean you can’t ask your brother to give you advice about fashion or really girly things.

B: True, but I ask my mom those things. I have learned that my mom is more like my best friend now that I am an adult, and I can tell her anything and everything. I hope some day E’claire and I will be like my mom and I are now. Sometimes I wonder if it is just a boy thing, like the boys go off and get married and then they don’t need their parents as much, not like daughters do. I can think of so many examples, and when I think about this it makes me sad because Brody is such a mama’s boy.

L:     I am sure you guys are close, but I can’t imagine asking my mom about private things. Maybe it’s different for you. Can you imagine asking your mom about sex advice? Yikes. I can see how a close sister might be helpful for questions like that.

B:     No, I don’t talk to her about that and didn’t talk to my best friends about that one either. I guess I have always been too confident in that area. Kind of laugh saying that, but it is true. Should also say that I didn’t become active until 21 so I was mature about it.

L:     I don’t talk to anyone about that either, but I know a lot of women do. What about dating advice? Would you have asked her?

B:     I did talk to my mom about dating and she always gave me really great advice. I still talk to her about everything. She is away in San Antonio this week and next and I have texted her around 50 times.

L:     Wow. I am impressed. You don’t need a sister. You have your mom.

B:     I agree, but I still wonder what it would have been like to have a sister in my growing up years. Are your brothers still like best friends?

L:     Nah…we had a rift in the family and we’re not that close anymore.

B:    Too bad, but I do know the story and thought the boys were still cool with one another.

L:    I don’t think I told you the whole story. I just told you my stuff. There’s a lot more and it’s hard to forgive my oldest brother.

B:    I am sure that is hard on your mom?

L:    It is, but it is for the best. Maybe in time my other brother can forgive him.

Lila:     Is it me or is narcissism an epidemic created by the media? I recently downloaded 2 songs from a singer named Jason Derulo and in both songs, he says his name. Now I know, he is a singer and they have an ego to begin with, but he is not the only person who needs to assert himself this way. Think about all those parties that are being thrown these days where you can hire fake paparazzi to be there. I mean what is that all about? The entertainment world is permeating to the normal world. I know this is not a new thing, but how did it get this bad?

Beatrice:     I have no idea, but seems to me we live in a very selfish world and unfortunately there are people out there that actually think the real world is celebrity world, when that is all fake. I think with all the technology and access to the world, it can perpetuate the problem.

L:     I think you are on to something. The accessibility to things that can make you a celebrity or give you 15 minutes of fame perpetuate the problem. Everyone thinks they can do it and gives them an ego. We have alway wanted to be like the stars we love, but now they have elevated themselves so much that crashing down to earth will kill them.

My friend, Shelby, acts like she is something really special. I know she’s really pretty and a lot of people confirm that, but her narcissistic attitude is ridiculous. I had dinner with her on Monday and she spent the whole 3 hours talking about herself like she was Paris Hilton or something.

B:     Sounds like your friend Shelby is insecure. This is what the real problem is, all these insecure individuals that crave and want the attention so that they feel loved. I don’t however think this is the majority of people. Just the ones who can not see straight and have a warped sense of reality and haven’t experienced what love is whether it be from their family during childhood or how to love oneself. So they crave it and think becoming celebrity or whatever will get them to that point.

L:     I know she’s insecure. She’s been dependent on her looks her whole life. Imagine when it dissipates. But can you imagine spending three hours hearing her talk about herself? I know she’s funny and all, but geez…give me a break. I am guessing this is what all these managers and agents have to deal with all day long.

B:     I have a friend who only talks about herself, and the minute you try to speak she will shoot you down or is ready to call it quits. You know her, Logan? So Shelby is not very smart? I have so many off the charts good-looking friends, and what makes them even more beautiful is they know they are good-looking but they don’t depend on it, as they are highly intelligent or very talented at something they have passion for. Again it all comes down to one’s upbringing and insecurities.

L:     It’s not like she is not smart, just well-educated. She really is like Paris Hilton. She knows how to get others to work for her and believe her, but you could not really ask her about current events. She’s not well-read. That is her biggest insecurity. Because if anyone really figured it out, they would be disappointed because she is not exactly deep.

B:     Well I would stay away from comparing her to Paris Hilton if she is well-educated, because Paris Hilton is a highschool drop out.

L:     Lol. I forgot the “not.” I meant that she is NOT well-educated.

 Watch the video here: Happy Geek Pride Day!!!

Beatrice:     So Brody is in soccer and the practices are twice a week, which Toolman has been present at. He has become the soccer dad. Ha ha. Anyway, there is a little boy on the team that loves Brody and wants to play outside of soccer with him. He reminded his mom that he wanted to set up a playdate. The mother comes over to us and asks Toolman if we can get together for a playdate sometime over Memorial Day weekend? I was floored, as they normally ask the mother. Toolman felt uncomfortable about the question and immediately said that is something you will need to run by Beatrice. The thing is I am not a huge fan of this woman and now I am faced to have a playdate with her and the kids. I always knew this was coming, but how to deal with it is another issue. I guess I will give it a shot and see how it goes. I guess it goes the other way too, where we are friends with the parents first, then the kids come and they are forced into a playdate and someday the kids may not like each other. Brody told me the other day that he likes Reece but not Paige (Ann’s kids). I asked him why and he said, “Paige is a crabby crab”. He is right about that, but funny he knew this too. So perceptive!

 

Lila:   And yes, kids are way too observant sometimes. They know how to judge character at a very young age. Not always accurately though.  Well, you can alway set the playdate that would require you to watch him constantly and you do not have to talk to the mother. There are lots of things you can do that would fit into that scenario. Besides, maybe you will like her. You only know one facet of her. Maybe she is interesting in some other way. You never know.

B:     She wants them to come over to their home, so it could be quite awkward. Anyway, she is very nerdy. I hate to even admit I just said that but she and I are like fire and ice. I guess I can keep the talk to the kids, or send Toolman. LOL. Brody is at that age where he wants to play with someone, even if it is me or his dad. He use to be so good at playing by himself, but not anymore as he thinks it is “boring”.

L:  Why do you call her nerdy?  Doesn’t he want to play with E’Claire? I guess he probably thinks she is too young and too girly for him.

B:      No, he typically does not want to play with her. She plays by different rules and they end up fighting. He typically succumbs but not usually a smooth playtime. They fight a lot!

I think this lady is nerdy because she is. Not sure how to describe her other than imagine your typical nerd and she fits the description. She works in the IT industry and is all around nerdy. She is hard to relate to. I have tried talking to her about various things and she is so philosophical it drives me nuts.

L:     What?!!! You know I am a huge nerd and yet you can relate to me. I told Oliver that if I ever had to look for another job, I am going to work for Apple. I am willing to start as a sales rep and move up. I want to learn all there is to know. I should have been a Computer Science major.

B:     I hardly would categorize you as a nerd. She is better described as a social misfit.

L:     But I fit the nerd type almost to a tee. I like Star Wars and Star Trek. I love Lord of the Rings even more. I love all things technology. I know too much about comic books. I have very few friends. I am way too geekie about numbers. I think I made my point.

B:     You may like a few nerdy things, but your attire and the way you dress is far from nerd. Besides, nerds aren’t interested in TMZ, reality shows on MTV, etc. I think you get my point. Nerds have lots of friends, typically they stick together and I would not categorize your friends as nerds. Sorry, you can’t convince me.

L:     I don’t just know a few nerdy things. I know a lot of nerdy things. I may be able to hide it with my clothes and cool demeanor (haha), but deep down, I am a nerd. You may have not watched the show, but do you recall Sarah Jessica Parker in Square Pegs. That was me in high school. I am a geek and a nerd. I personally like the title. Do you know I am good friends with the IT guys who work in Denver? That’s because we can relate.

B:     Sorry, you are not a nerd!

L:     Well, maybe her friends don’t think she is a nerd either.

B:     By all appearances she is a geek, and her discussions are too. Now I feel like a mean person. Oh well.

L:     I told you I am a geek and a nerd. Oh if you only knew.

Don’t feel bad. Just give her a chance.

B:     Like I don’t give people chances. You are talking to the girl who talks to anyone and everyone. I am not a hard person to know.

L:     That’s why I was surprised when you were ready to write her off because she’s a nerdy or nerd-like. I know you alway give a chance. That’s what is awesome about you.

B:     I will definitely go, who knows she may become my best friend. LOL

Hi everyone. Lila here. We just want to take a day off from our usual format because I wanted to express some of my personal thoughts on “Lost” and since Beatrice did not watch the show, she would not really have any input. So here it goes….

It’s Tuesday night and I am going through some serious withdrawals. Tuesday nights are great TV nights for me. Glee, Lost, V, Parenthood (yes, I am admitting to liking the show) are all on. Unfortunately, they are on at the same time so my Tivo overheats on Tuesdays. But not tonight. Lost is over and I am so sad. Never have a I been so dedicated to a show or personally invested in characters on a show. It has elicited sadness, anger, happiness, confusion, and too many other emotions to write down. But the most important feeling that has come out of all this, because of the finale on Sunday, is SATISFACTION.

Thank you Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse for taking me on this wild ride, but most importantly, giving me hope. As I watched the finale, I was completely happy with how all the characters were somehow able to make peace with themselves and found each other. The joy I had when I saw that Rose and Bernard were still on the island and very happy with their simple lives. If only we can all live like them. When Jin and Sun realized that they had a child together, it brought tears to my eyes. However, when Sawyer, the bad boy of the show, found his true love, Juliet, I could not hold back. That tough exterior broke down again because he had his true love back in his arms. Everyone must have been touched.

But if I must complain about the show, there is one thing…how dare they make my Hurley cry again!!!! Enough! Stop doing that to him. I think he was the perfect choice for the protector of the island. He and his sidekick, Ben, will embark on many adventures in the future. I hope there is a spin-off of the show with the two of them and call it “Found.”

As for the sideways reality, that so many complained about, including myself at the beginning, I hope there will be a place like that for all of us in the afterlife. Everything about the show can be summed up in the last conversation between Jack and his father, Christian. They were all there because they were dead, but more importantly, they had a second chance to make peace with their own flawed lives and the complicated relationships that they had with others in their lives. Everything happened and nothing can be changed, but have faith that everything will work out in time. The writers are saying, “Hey, you can’t give up on Faith. It exists.” Faith gave them a chance to find each other and make amends with their lives. (I appreciate how the writers were careful to not identify with any specific religion because all religions really preach the same thing. That church, where the “funeral” was held, had all the religious faiths displayed around the room.) I hope that when I have passed, it will be like this. I hope I will get to see  the loved ones that I have lost to have that one last conversation with them. I hope there will be a Desmond, who will guide me along. I loved the ending so much that I would like to join the Church of Lost. It gave me so much hope because God knows, I need it. We all need hope.

So again, thank you Lost for the journey, for the renewal in hope and faith. Thank you.

Beatrice:     So did you watch Lost last night? I have never seen one episode but have heard about the show and what it is about, so I tuned in after Celebrity Apprentice was over and watched the last half hour. I am assuming that Jack’s father helped him realize he was dead and not that the others died on the plane as they escaped but that they lived life. But once they died they met at this place to find one another. His dad was a shepard? I know none of the other’s names, but was wondering if you enjoyed the ending or if you thought is was a let down.

Lila:     That is the gist of the finale, but there was so much more. The series dealt with life and death and what happens after they died.  I LOVED LOVED it!!! It’s meaning was deep and satisfying. When they first landed on the island, the audience speculated that they were in Purgatory. But they weren’t. The island was the source of life. It kept the good and bad at a balance. It was fate and free-will rolled into one. But at the end, after everybody had died, none of them could move on until they had made peace with their own lives and that is why the sideways reality began. They all recreated a world where they could meet up and resolve their issues. The ending gave me peace. And I hope the afterlife is very much like this. I think I am going to subscribe to the Church of Lost.

B:     There sure were a lot of followers for the show, but I was not one of them. Had no interest, and mainly because I don’t have time during the weekdays to even watch television.

Did you see that Bret Michaels won the Celebrity Apprentice? He has a stagger to his walk since having his stroke, and the entire time I was watching I was nervous that he was going to go into cardiac arrest. The finale was much different from seasons prior in that they did not hound him or his competition out of respect for his condition.

L:     I heard that he won. Outside of the one episode where they were raising money, I do not watch the show at all. Do you think he deserved to win?

B:     Yes, he did a very good job throughout the season. Holly won $347K in one episode, thanks to Sharon Osbourne. It was not of Holly’s doing. She did a good job too, but Bret is far more talented than she is and he is a really hard worker. He was a surprise to watch and end up liking. So the underdog from the beginning of the show and a huge upset by the end. He has a lot of respect from businessmen and goes with his gut instincts and tends to be right.

L:     How did Sharon help Holly win the $347K? I thought they were on opposite teams.

That’s nice to hear Bret won. He’s been through a lot.

B:     Sharon was the project manager for the opposite team and raised all the money, but lost as a PM that time and whatever they both raise the winning PM gets. Boy, you don’t watch the show do you? I keep telling Toolman he would do well on this show but he thinks I am crazy.

L:     Nope. Don’t watch the show at all. You are going to have a one-sided conversation if you want to talk about Celebrity Apprentice.

Believe it or not, I avoid reality TV. I like Survivor and The Amazing Race because a lot of thought is put into those shows. The Hills and The City are not true reality TV to me. I think most of it is scripted for the most part.

B:     I think there is a lot of good that comes out of Celebrity Apprentice which raises money for charities, however I prefer the Apprentice with normal people. I haven’t watched an episode of The Hills or The City this season, only read about the Hills because of Heidi. I have never liked The City, so don’t watch it. I try not to tune into MTV at all now that my children are of age where they may pick up on things I don’t want. I really only watch television on Sundays, so whatever is on I watch. Like the Real Housewives shows are on and those are a complete train wreck. Last night I watched Kendra, which I like. I am not sure why but I find that girl hilarious and genuine, so I watch her.


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